Journal — March 30, 2017 — lucidity, trust, learning, home
The word “guidance”, for spiritually inclined people, refers to the phenomenon of seemingly unrelated events conspiring to lead you in a remarkably appropriate direction.
Synchronicity is a good concept to study, for the serious guidance-follower. (source) Once you start to notice it, you can learn to consciously follow it. I’ve been developing this habit, over the last year, and I can now say from experience: it makes life very rewarding, very unpredictable, and, at certain points, absolutely terrifying.
I find myself at one of these points, at the moment.
The first step in following guidance is to set an intention, so I want to take a moment to recall the intentions I’ve set already for this year.
I started on the winter solstice, with the intention to develop four specific qualities in myself:
Turn right, then go straight. For how long? If you’re committed to arriving, you won’t ask questions like that. (source) Two months later, these four cryptic, abstract guideposts led me to a much more concrete intention: to form a household.
Now comes the question: what did I do in those two months, to get there?
The next step after setting an intention – the way I do it, at least – is to go directly towards it, all the time, every day.
It has to be said: this is emotionally taxing. I’ve had to build myself up to stay in that mode, for as much time as I’m able – which still isn’t 100% of the time, although by now it’s more than half.
A blog about a blog about a blog about a blog about a blog about– (source) This step is actually what I mean when I say “the will to arrive”, so I was already practicing one of those four qualities from day one. Day one was, in reality, before the winter solstice.
I looked at this list I made, and thought: how can I arrive at common language? I would need to share my thoughts with people, one way or another, which led me to the idea of starting a blog. So, I did.
Meanwhile, I was making many other attempts, every day, to go forward with my intention.
For the common language part, I spoke with people much more often and much more directly about my ideas.
For the receiving part, I practiced saying “yes”, asking for what I want, and being grateful for every little thing that comes to me.
Restoring basic elements of the social fabric, in a privatized culture: surprisingly challenging. Especially when it’s about laundry. (source) For the common resources part, the actual ideas that I shared were things such as, “how about we make a pact to do laundry together?”
For the arriving part, I just kept going forward with the other parts, as persistently and confidently as I could.
All these small actions stirred up a lot of energy in my life, and I was suddenly bombarded with guidance.
Well, it’s not the most common language, but it’s the thought that counts! (source) I remember, from the very first day, my amazement at how fast these coincidental events would answer me. If my memory is right, less than 48 hours after saying to myself, “right, now I’m going for common language”, I had the opportunity to get in touch with an important figure in the Esperanto community.
This is a perfect example, because, to my rational mind, there seemed to be no reason at all for me to respond to that opportunity. The only reason I did is that I saw the connection with my intention: language. So, I took it.
I still have no idea where that particular line is leading me, or whether it’ll lead anywhere at all; I’m still following it. But that was one line among many, and on some I already found treasures.
I arrived, and arrived, and arrived, but never knew where I was going. (source) One such line took me ten kilometers away from Tamera, for an experiment in community organization. I never would have done that, except for the fact I was saying to myself, every day: “will to arrive! will to arrive!”
There, the whole process intensified enormously. I did everything from implementing kaizen culture, to disentangling the issues of a family caught in the throes of a destructive cultural concept of education, to drawing an improbably accurate symbol of my own anima from a magic deck of cards.
That’s where I arrived at the intention to form a household, finally. Which was the beginning of the process I’m in now.
Rivers meander because they go straight. (source) The third step, which is about as far as I’ve come, is to meet obstacles. Doing this well requires fine discernment.
Some obstacles, I simply go around. I always look twice, in these cases, because such trivial obstacles might also be guideposts.
Some, I stop at, because I see no way around. This is wise as long as I keep thinking and looking for a solution. It becomes unwise as soon as I think the same thought or look in the same place twice. Whatever I do, if I have the will to arrive, I will not wait.
If a mountain stands in your way, you have two options: start climbing, or start digging. (source) Sometimes it simply isn’t possible to go around. Then, I must go through. This requires discipline, and, more than anything else, patience.
If I stay true to my purpose – which is deeper and older than any intentions I might form, along the way – there’s no use in questioning whether I’ll go through or not. That’s only an excuse to hesitate, when I already know the answer.
My new job, as of yesterday, is “campus maintenance”. This is where guidance led me: I maintain the infrastructureCommon resources. of a place meant to welcomeReceive. students.Common language.
When I look at the situation rationally, it appears absolutely absurd. It seems inconceivable that this could be the shortest path to my goals, but I don’t see a shorter path.
I see a tremendous array of little clues that I’m in the right place at the right time, and, even while my thoughts ricochet between visions of grandeur and blind panic, my heart is at peace for no reason I can name.
Guidance leads to interesting places.